Comments on La Rochefoucauld

I will be posting short essays on each of La Rouchefoucauld's Maxims

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I am the author of "Diaphysics," a poet, playwright, and interdisciplinary scholar. I am married and have a daughter and two sons. I have a Ph.D. in the Humanities, a M.A. in English, and a B.A. in recombinant gene technology and chemistry.

Thursday, April 21, 2005

Maxim 636

"To be lukewarm in love oneself is a sure way of inspiring love."

I have heard it said that there is no more repulsive a perfume than desperation. When you have given up, when you no longer care about love, that is when you find people interested, wanting you. You sit in the corner, indifferent, and another comes along and sees you, finds your lack of interest interesting. Why does he not look at me? she asks herself – and thus is interest sparked. What happened that he is not looking for love? Has he been hurt? – thus the maternal instincts kick in. Is he so strong he does not need love? – thus the need for a protector kicks in. Has she given up on love? – thus the need for conquest kicks in.

And not only this, but when you are in a relationship – if one continues to express love in its fullest, the other takes that love for granted. But if it is seen to wane in the least, ardor erupts in the other, to try to win the other back to love. It is a game we play because we are insecure. And because we all too often take each other for granted. Our friends will always be there. He or she will always love me. Yet, without working at maintaining our loves and friendships, they will indeed wane. Becoming lukewarm reminds the other that they should not take us for granted – and their becoming lukewarm reminds us as well.

2 Comments:

Blogger Ari said...

This is one of the truest, and to me most annoying, things about human nature.

6:54 PM  
Anonymous mortgage company said...

thought-provoking, mootable pv. just my thoughts, well anyways gl & be chipper is what i say

11:08 PM  

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